That’s the only explanation I can think of when looking at some of Giuseppe Zanotti’s designs lately. Zanotti must be making a very public, very widespread bid to become the personal shoe atelier of Lady Gaga, because half his line looks like it was made with only her (and perhaps Daphne Guinness) in mind. They’re certainly the first people who came to mind when I laid eyes on the Giuseppe Zanotti Extreme Platform Wedges Booties. Even with the word “extreme” in it, the name of this shoe doesn’t quite convey the insanity of its appearance, does it?

These shoes easily have the tallest heel of any I’ve ever seen at a mainstream shopping site – 7.5 inches. That absolutely dwarfs the insane-in-their-own-right Christian Louboutin Daffodils, which ring in at a bit over six. Not only that, but the heel is abrupt – it doesn’t extend as far back as wedges normally do. If you put a pair of these on your feet, don’t lean back. Don’t even stand. Please, please don’t walk. I don’t think Zanotti’s willing to pay for the physical therapy you’ll need after you break both your ankles. Buy through ShopBop for $995.