It’s the end of the week and you know what that means: a crazy shoe of some sort or another on which I’d like to hear you pontificate. This week, the object of our Fill in the Blank affections is the Giuseppe Zanotti Suede Bow Sandals. That name just sounds so…innocuous, doesn’t it? Suede is soft and friendly. Bows are happy and girly. This sueded, bow-decked sandal? It could kill you like eight different ways, including (but not limited to) impalement and falling over and smacking your little head on the pavement. Still, though, these shoes are totally hot for those who are skilled enough to maneuver in them.

Or at least that’s what I think! Tell us what you think by finishing the title sentence in the comments, or just proceed directly to Luisa Via Roma and buy these shoes for $895 via Bergdorf Goodman.

Yves Saint Laurent Cardilam Loafer Pump, $795 via Neiman Marcus

The Yves Saint Laurent Cardilam Loafer Pumps were one of the most buzzed-about runway shoes of the Spring 2012 shows, and now they’ve finally landed at one of our favorite retailers for your pre-ordering pleasure. Act fast, though; as of this writing, only three sizes are left!

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Casadei Cutout Platform Sandals, $1320 via Neiman Marcus

Every now and then, a shoe comes around that makes me bemoan the lack of cutouts in current footwear. Sometimes it’s because the shoe is dearly in need of one in order to provide any kind of visual interest, other times it’s because a shoe has them and reminds me of what an awesome design element a cutout can be. Obviously, the Casadei Cutout Platform Sandal falls into the latter category.

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Brian Atwood Mojito Sandals, $1452 via Bergdorf Goodman

It’s not even February yet, but that doesn’t stop designers from rushing their pieces to retail to get us salivating for the new season (and new shoes, of course). Brian Atwood’s footwear is always known for its exuberance and joie de vivre, so early (very early) spring is often when his shoes look most appropriate; they reflect the internal mindsets of all of us, impatiently anticipating the arrival of sun and fun.

Even the name of the Brian Atwood Mojito Sandals makes me want to put on some sunscreen and head outside. Unfortunately, I’d have to do put on a wool coat over my sunscreen, but a girl can dream. It’ll be spring before we know it, right?

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In all seriousness, though, my thoughts on these shoes are already known. Judging by the fact that several sizes of the Isabel Marant Willow Sneakers are already sold out on Net-a-Porter, I thought I’d make a little PSA: If you want them, go get them through Net-a-Porter for $760. You heard me, GO.

Alexander McQueen Studded Platform Sandals, $2295 via Nordstrom

Even as man brands decide to try out lower-heeled and platformless shoes in the wake of season after season of vertiginous ankle-breakers, Alexander McQueen stands strong in its love for extreme shoes. Normally this would be a thing about which I’d gripe, but for a company as committed to the extreme and perilous as McQueen, on an aesthetic level, a crazy shoe makes a lot of sense.

The Alexander McQueen Studded Platform Sandal is just the latest in a long line of similar designs, but it’s worth revisiting for the heel alone. Look at that thing.

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Gucci Ophelie Suede Pump, $1195 via Neiman Marcus

I’m generally quite a fan of Gucci creative director Frida Giannini, but most of my admiration comes as a result of her beautiful, sexy, thoroughly Italian ready-to-wear collections. The people who she has heading up the shoe and handbag divisions have impressed me a bit less since she began her tenure with the company, but not so much so that I’ve ever really felt the need to call them out. Sometimes the stuff is pretty, sometimes it’s not, and the two options occur in approximately equal proportions. Usually, that is.

By contrast, I adore the Gucci Ophelie Suede Pumps. I wasn’t particularly impressed with any of Gucci’s shoes from the Spring 2012 runway, but now that I have a better look at these, they’re fantastic.

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Jil Sander Patent Leather Platforms, $550 via Net-a-Porter

As spring inches its way closer, it’s hard to miss all the lovely sandals and espadrilles that are starting to make their ways to retail in advance of the season. Sadly, it’s equally difficult to miss the smattering of “flatforms” that hide in their midst; they take up so much visual space that I’m not sure how anyone looking at a group of shoes can see anything else. Despite the fact that these Jil Sander Patent Leather Platform Sandals fit well within the brand’s New Minimal aesthetic, I was sick of shoes like these last year and I’d rather not see them again.

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Image via the Neiman Marcus Tumblr

Since it’s Friday and all, I couldn’t help but share this with you guys. For the 20th anniversary of Christian Louboutin’s fetish-worthy footwear, Neiman Marcus commissioned graffiti artist Gaole “Make” Canote to do this huge, stories-tall rendition of a Christian Louboutin pump on the side of a Los Angeles…parking garage? It looks like it’s probably a parking garage. The most devestatingly chic parking garage on earth.

I like the graffiti so much that I wouldn’t mind if Louboutin turned it into an actual shoe. Can we get one of these in New York, please?

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Chloe Leather and Suede Sneaker Wedges, $395 via Net-a-Porter

As I may have mentioned, oh, a couple of times, I’m not much of a fan of the wedge sneaker. Isabel Marant’s version is undoubtedly the best, and if you want to get this look, you should totally stick with hers – they’re more expensive, yes, but they’re not utterly outrageous or anything. The See by Chloe Leather and Suede Sneaker Wedges don’t hold up very well in comparison.

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